Here we go again..

It's been awhile since I've been here. I know, I know.. I neglect this thing a little too much. But I've been .. troubled since A-kon ended.
Basically.. it was not the pleasant experience I had hoped it would be. Granted, I did catch up on all my manga and I even found a new band to worship - Psycho le Cemu (THEIR CONCERT WAS AWESOME!! Too band their CDs all sold out on Friday!), but.. I fear that I lost two of my friends.

I was.. neglected. Ditched was the word during A-kon, but neglected would sound better to describe the experience. I was supposed to be in a female Wolfwood/Vash pair, but I ended up mostly alone. Well.. not really alone, more like.. unpaired. I spent most of my time with Rochelle, and while there's nothing wrong with that.. I would've also liked to spend some time with Aimee and Melanie. But then again.. there's that pesky thing that always seems to be in the way.. "boyfriend". They both brought along their boyfriends, meaning in the group that I was in, the hotel room n'such.. contained about.. 5 or 6 couples. Needless to say.. I was feeling rather suffocated. Chelle was my companion of choice for the better part of the weekend. Antwan was off being an A-kon volunteer, and we both wanted to go to the Lolita picnic, so we spent the majority of time together. I would say that out of all the CH people I'm going to miss, no one compares to Chelle. She is the voice of reason amongst the other unreasonable voices and I don't know what I'm going to do without her. Probably come back after my first year and drag her down with me.
Anyway.. back to the story. I'm sure that Melanie and Aimee would counter that I ditched them to go to the hotel beforehand, but then again.. they were eating and chose to stay behind. It was not my fault that my mother was in a meeting (she was the one who ordered the hotel room for us, after all), and it was a circumstance that I could not control.
As for the biggest fiasco.. it once again is the concept of the "club". Lizard Lounge. I was told that Melanie and Aimee might go on Friday, but not Saturday, because of the fact it was the A-kon rave. When I was told that they would NOT be going to the club on Friday, I assumed they wouldn't be going at all. Saturday rolls around.. and Aimee and Melanie both leave the room with their respective boyfriends. I was taking a little break and reading some manga, when they walked out of the room. I assumed that they were going to go downstairs and hang out before the rave, because Melanie was dressed in what I assumed was her rave outfit. After some situations occured in the room.. I needed to get out. I went downstairs in search of them and I called them to see where they were. I was astonished and angry to learn that they went on to Lizard Lounge. And I assumed by the time that they would return.. the rave would be over. I felt betrayed and very hurt. And in my anger, I found that other people had suffered at the hands of Aimee and Melanie. Melanie had treated Jon, Matt, and Cade in a similar fashion. And even Aimee, who had condemned Melanie's friend ditching ways, had walked away from me in the middle of our conversation when her boyfriend came up and hugged her.
I was very angry when they returned, because I had missed out on most of the rave waiting for them to return, because they did not have a key. I told the people in the room to not let them in the room, because I wished to speak with them first. But of course.. there is usually no speaking to Aimee.. and a fight resulted. She walked away, flicking me off, leaving me and most of her friends behind.. like she had done earlier that night. In fact.. she left behind a friend that she had driven over.. who also had things in her car. So when Sunday rolled around, Antwan and I had to take her friend and her friend's boyfriend home.
After I came home, I did not mention anything in my xanga about the situation, simply how I had felt angry. I did not tell "my side of the story". I wrote that if they wanted to reconcile our friendship, they would have to contact me. I wasn't going to be the one to extend the olive branch.
Melanie has not spoken with me, and until Sunday, neither had Aimee.
Sunday was when Aimee and I had to go down to Stephen F. Austin to attend orientation. I dreaded it, because I did not want to spend 3 days with a person that I was still angry at. Still.. necessity forced me to talk to her. We barely mentioned the A-kon incident, and if we did.. it was not to apologize. We avoided apologizing all together, and I assumed that maybe this was behind us.
Well.. I was wrong. I woke up this morning to find an entry in her xanga, condemning me once again, as if she was soley the victim. Neither of us was the sole victim, we just assumed that we were the victims. So once again, I am left without two of my friends. I'm beginning to think that maybe Melanie doesn't want my friendship, after all.. she is the one who will do anything to get a boyfriend, including betray friends. And I don't know about Aimee. I truely don't know what to do.
Yesterday.. I was feeling rather good. After all, Aimee and I were speaking, and I had even met a guy. He was rather good looking and very nice and he gave me (and others..) his email address, and I gave him mine. I'm hoping he'll email soon.. because I think he's really cute.. and he knows about anime, likes DDR, and is an all around cool guy. Who knows? If he has a girlfriend.. then at least I made a new friend.
I could sure use some right about now..
Until we meet again..
Tahiti